Opps! I forgot!

What! All of the sudden all my ideas, plans, & thoughts about my future have taken a turn. Not like it is all happening right now, but I kind of am in a weird spot. Being sick totally made me appreciate living life! It made me realize how fun it is to clean my house and how great a lick on the cheek can feel from your overly excited lab. I feel like I need to waste up for the last year that was spent on the couch, drugged up.  I appreciate life so much more and have no desire to waste it on certain things, and have a strong desire to jump head first into others.

Last year before I even had my appendectomy I was enrolled in Physiology. I was very overwhelmed with going to school on my lunch break and actually having to comprehend things I never knew. I dropped, it ended up being a good thing because I got appendicitis and would have failed from missing so much class. So, in the fall I started taking Anatomy, it consumed my life! Even though I was sick I was going to make it through, until the short term memory loss started and I found out I had the brain cysts...o.k. fine I dropped again. I went to sign up for it again this year and was actually dreading it... plus I can't even get on the wait list of 30 people because I am a returning student. Think I would have gotten the hint then, but NO! I am a little bit dense sometimes.

As silly as it sounds the many suggestions of starting a gourmet cupcake business have sparked my interests. I never would have thought I would have ever entertained the idea in a million years, but it sounds so perfect! I was being frustrated with not being able to enroll in classes today when I remembered something Tiff said to me last year when I started Physio and Anatomy, if you cant do it maybe you are supposed to be doing something else. I scoffed at the idea both times, thinking of course I can do it, just try and stop me. Um, well, God kind of did stop me.

I have always had a dream of being involved in physical therapy, since I was 6! At first it was to get a master's degree, but I soon realized working full time and getting my masters was going to take far too long. So then it was my BA, but then I realized it would involve lots of traveling and yet again it would be a long time before I would be able to get that degree. Ok, fine then how about athletic training, still not sure on this one, but looks like Shasta College no longer offers those classes! What they hay! Oh, wait, I forgot to ask God! Opps! I never have one time said "God what career have you chosen for me?" I have asked for Gabe many times, but never myself. How foolish! I just always assumed that I had these dreams of physical therapy because it was what I was supposed to do with my life. But, maybe not... maybe I had these dreams because it is where I am supposed to be now. I have an awesome job, with insurance, and vacation time. It pays the bills and I love what I do, but maybe it is not supposed to be my career.

Now, I am not saying my career is supposed to be a gourmet cupcake business, although that would rock, but maybe it is something I never thought of... So, I am now taking some pre-reqs in the fall, and a business class  I think...like I said I can't register yet. I really love the idea of this though! It interests me, and I can take the classes all online, so I won't be overwhelmed!

Gabe & I have recently realized there are a few things we forgot to ask God about when we planned them out, and that was pretty silly. We are bringing those things to God now, asking Him what His plan is. You would think we would have learned that a long time ago, but like I said I am dense apparently or maybe it is just stubborn. Either way I am asking now, and doing my best to listen...who knows maybe I will end up a P.T. someday or maybe I will end up the cupcake queen, but right now I am happy at this place and will do my best to patiently wait for an answer.


Jeremiah 29:11-13  For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.12 In those days when you pray, I will listen. 13 If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.

If you want to hear God laugh...

So, I love the country song that says something along the lines of "if you want to hear God laugh tell him your plans." So true! I am a planner, hate surprises! I look toward the next step whether its planning every minute of my weekend or the next 30 years, I have it all planned out. God has to laugh at my ideas and goals sometimes because they are so not his plans half the time. When I was a freshman and pretty much through my junior year I was dead set on Australia, I was going to live there for at least a few months, get a job, go to school, and maybe never leave. Then my wonderful husband came into my life...silly boys they ruin everything. But, God knew far in advance I would never live in Australia and he had such a better plan for me, one where I would be loved and would have a family that doubled in size and I would have a place I could never imagine leaving.

I am thankful I don't know everything that is to come sometimes, if you would have told me a boy would have kept me from Australia I would have laughed you out of the room, but ya know what I never thought there was a boy like Gabe out there. God has showed me and us that our plans are just silly and that we need to stop making them, or at least stop being surprised when they don't work. From looking for a house to my plans to stay healthy, God has known what the future would hold, and let me say his plan is SO much better!

I have been trying to go to school since I graduated, wanting a degree... thinking of running a physical therapy business, dreaming of being a successful therapist that people talk about all over. Well, yeah that would take like 12 years with working full time and traveling down to Sac and back for half of that adventure. Not to mention I am way behind thanks to all my surgeries and being sick so much. Now, I have NO desire to do that anymore, ya know what I want to be successful at? Being a great wife and an awesome mama someday Never thought I would ever say that, but that sounds way more satisfying.

Gabe was supposed to graduate with a degree that would throw him into a great career, come to find out that degree would have thrown us in the city (EWWW!) and to boot there is no work right now for that career.

O life! I honestly never thought I would be here. Living this life. I never thought I would have been through so much by 22 & be what I like to think of as kind of an adult. I never thought I would have experienced God so much not only for myself, but with my husband as well. Never thought I would long for a career that involved baking cupcakes! Never thought life could be so good! God knew! Every moment was planned by God. From the songs on the radio to the conversation my husband and I have been having all night.

So what is next God? What is the next step? The next adventure my husband & I get to go on with you in this crazy life? Is it a gourmet cupcake business? Is it a real yard for our house? You just let me know God & I will do my best to listen and trust that your plan is way better.

As for those next 30 years, I have no clue what they hold. All the plans I had for them have changed drastically & I do not even have a clue of what to try & plan in them. My life is at a place I have never been comfortable with, it is not planned, it is not micromanaged, it is happening. I am living it day by day and taking on the adventure as it comes. I do not know what tomorrow holds, or what opportunities will arise. I do know God is control, he has my life mapped out, and that means the road has got to be a pretty good one.